I’m a hopeless romantic.

But some of my favorite movies are about the tragedy of love. Steel Magnolias (1989), When Harry Met Sally (1989), Romeo & Juliet (1996), and Moulin Rouge! (2001) are movies I can watch repeatedly. The madness of love – with all the glitter, singing, and pain – is such a spectacle.

moulinrouge

Perhaps I have a rather warped understanding of love, though. My dad’s parents were hopeless romantics, however, my parents divorced when I was a teenager. As a result, I’ve intimately witnessed two different types of marriage. It makes sense, I guess, that I’ve spent my life trying to understand it.

We all crave and need love. It’s is so complicated and simultaneously simple. What a contradiction.

The contradiction of love is what I’m feeling deeply today, on my third wedding anniversary. Wait, that sounds unintentionally ominous. Let me explain.

My husband and I are madly in love. We love each other more today than ever, which is a precious and wonderful feeling. He’s my rock, my hero, and my everything. It makes me feel like the luckiest woman in the world!

We genuinely cherish one another – to the point where we’ve been told it makes others nauseous. (True story.)

We got hitched three years ago today! I love this man with all my heart!

A photo posted by Camden Watts (@camdenwatts) on

That’s the kind of thing I want to share with the world. I love this man so much and I’m so amazed that he loves me, too. Our love won’t change the world, but it has most certainly changed my world.

At the same time, though, I feel badly making such proclamations.

It’s kind of rotten to be so boastful about love, especially when it’s such a fragile and precious thing, right? It should be protected and nurtured, not put on display, shouldn’t it?

Plus, it’s unfair to the people who are not in a similar place. Those who are searching for love, were recently hurt, or are mourning a loss might feel awful seeing public displays of affection. They may feel like we’re rubbing it in their face instead of living the truth for ourselves, and that makes me sad.

But don’t we all want to witness love?

Isn’t that why we watch movies? Because we get to live out our fantasies on the big screen, seated safety in the comfort of our own chair. We watch to really feel something – anything – that’ll make us remember we’re alive! To remind us to take risks in life, instead of playing it safe.

Ok, so what does this have to do with my film career?

Everything and nothing.

I’m in a transitional period, I guess.

My first few films were discoveries. I love each one, and especially the hard-earned lessons those films taught me. The air of exploration and experimentation with making movies is something I want to carry forward on every project.

Thing is … I’m ready for new, uncharted territory.

I’m not entirely sure what that means. But I am coming to terms with what’s changing in the world around me, my heart and mind, and the kind of art I want to create next. I’m ready to dig deeper, take more calculated risks, and be a little less shy about it all.

It’s a strange, uncomfortable, and really really vulnerable space. The kind that feels like it could be great … or catastrophic. And you’ll never really know which, until the dust settles.

No matter what, I’m incredibly grateful for you.

Yes, you.

Thank you all for following along with this wild journey. I’m so happy to have you by my side every step of the way as I make movies, especially when I’m not entirely sure what’s ahead. Thanks for being there and sharing my love of movie making.

Y’all are amazing.

Thank you.

More soon. I’ve got some celebrating to do. 🙂