Earlier this week, I submitted a grant application.
While reading through the grant specifics last week, I actually found a lot of clarity in the movie I want to make. I’ve been thinking about and working on this new documentary for years, but the fog wouldn’t lift. It was really frustrating.
On the other side of submitting that application, I’m so thankful I did it. The whole process can be pretty scary. You invest a lot of time and effort and hope into the application, and it’s all for naught sometimes.
It can cause a lot of resistance.
It’s taken me years to learn how to process resistance. Is my resistance fear of something legitimate? Is it a fear that I need to push through? Or is the resistance something else, and I need to find my way through that?
My most recent resistance with this project was complex.
It’s a big, beautiful, bold story. I have a lot of respect and admiration for it. Plus, the potential for cinematic storytelling and positive impact are huge. I’d like to see those come to life. That’s a lot of pressure.
This is much bigger than anything I’ve done so far and I want to do it justice, which means I need the resources to tackle that vision.
Resources aren’t just funding, either. I mean the artistic guidance, access to experience, and help making decisions that exceed my level of training.
Whether the movie receives this particular grant or not, I’m incredibly thankful for the clarity I found while preparing for it this week. It brought me so many wonderful insights about how to move forward from here. For that, I’m incredibly grateful.
There’s a lot more work ahead of me.
I know this post is pretty ambiguous in terms of what I’m working on. I have my reasons. But I’ll gladly talk with you about the project in person any time, especially if you can handle a level of enthusiasm that leads to fractured sentences and lots of hand gestures.
In the meantime, stay tuned.
We’re going to have some pretty exciting announcements coming your way this month. Sign up for free emails here, so you won’t miss a thing. You’ll also find me on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram.